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By Rebecca, December 12, 2008 9:28 pm

I changed my name on Facebook a while back from J to R. I stressed about it at the time, but the only responses I’ve gotten have been positive, and I haven’t gotten a ton of responses to  begin with. But, although I have an ‘alias’ email address which sends as R, my primary email address still sends as J.

Now – as I’m moving toward transitioning at work, have both of my parents calling me R (although my dad does it somewhat awkwardly, that’s OK for now), and have all of my friends calling me R – I’m wondering if I’m ready to take that ultimate plunge.

Am I ready to change the name which shows up in people’s inboxes for my primary email address?

This also plays into my name change thoughts. I’m still thinking of changing my name to JR (a different J…) and going by R, my new middle name. Two reasons for this are A) I like the way it sounds, but like thinking of myself as R more, and B) I don’t want to have to change my email address from jlastname@, particularly because rlastname@ is, in my mind, my dad’s email address.

Yes, I’m actually planning my name change in part on how it will affect my email.

-R

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By Rebecca, August 2, 2008 6:53 am

My dad (both my parents, actually) came to see my performance at the end of the week-long workshop, and he sent me this email a day later:

I have to tell you that I was extraordinally impressed by the quality of all of the performances, including yours. More than that, however, I was moved almost to tears by your words as well as your acting, both of which obviously came from deep within you. I am truly sorry that you have had to shoulder your pain and anguish alone for all these years. But never alone again. I love you very much. Dad

I know our communication is a bit strained right now, but the lines “I am truly sorry that you have had to shoulder your pain and anguish alone for all these years. But never alone again.” really struck a nerve on how he sees my identity as trans and how I’ve dealt with it. I sent him the following response:

Continue reading 'From dad; to dad'»