I just got home from a Ladies of Chicago Theatre evening (I think the first). Two Executive Directors from large(r) Chicago theatres invited women who are Managing Directors, General Managers, and Executive Directors at other Chicago area theatres and arts organizations to one of their homes for food and drinks and networking.

I was worried that everyone would be considerably older than me, that everyone would be from larger theatres than where I work, that everyone would know I was trans and reject me from this “women’s only” space, that everyone would already know each other and I’d sit alone to the sidelines, that I’d leave feeling a more heightened sense of a lack of communities in my life.

I had a great time, and left feeling really good about the whole experience.

First, the organizers had thought ahead and had name tags and markers. They asked everyone to put their name and organization, which helped immensely in placing people and remembering their faces linked with their names. And, while lots of people obviously did know each other, many more didn’t. It was the type of evening where you were allowed (and encouraged) to turn to someone, stick out your hand, and introduce yourself.

Likewise, the age/experience range was broad enough that I didn’t feel awkward. I would guess I’m on the younger end of the women who were there, but I definitely wasn’t the youngest and I didn’t feel awkwardly young compared to everyone else. And I forget just how many theatre companies there are in Chicago – I knew a lot of the organizations that were there, but hadn’t heard of others (and wasn’t alone in this, either).

It also felt amazing to be included in a women’s only space. To feel absolutely no awkwardness or hesitation from anyone else there in accepting me as part of this group. I won’t lie – it was also really nice to not feel “read.” (As much as that word, and “passing” in general, are both really problematic.) And when I did hand out show postcards, which explicitly note I’m trans, I got a lot of, “Awesome! I’ll have to try and come see it!” and not even a hint of, “What the hell are you doing at this ladies’ night, man?”

The whole experience felt extremely validating, both personally, professionally, and artistically.

I don’t assume this one evening will magically change the feelings I’ve had, of a lack of community in my life. I still need to find recurring events like these – be they theatre-related or not – to build a consistent experience of connection.

But I’m really glad I went, and that I got a much-needed boost in a lot of different ways.

3 Responses to “Community”

1. Bond says:

   November 17, 2009 at 10:27 pm

   Yay.

   Reply
2. John says:

   November 18, 2009 at 8:06 am

   U Go Girl

   Reply
3. Rebecca says:

   November 18, 2009 at 11:18 am

   Thanks!

   Reply