As for bras…ugh. I have a few that fit me well (I think/hope) but, while trying stuff on at the Gap, was frustrated to realize that not only do clothing sizes differ between companies (barely understandable) but bra sizes do, too! What the hell?! If an H&M 36B fits, so should one from the Gap!

I’m useless on everything else.

My bra straps are often showing in tank tops, I don’t really care but if you are going out and wearing a nice dress or something like that you should invest in a strapless bra.

I think the “girl boxers” are a good suggestion, here they are called “boy shorts” but marketed to women, ha. They are just cut higher and are bigger, they’re sort of like briefs, but with flowers.

I hate camel-toe, I think it’s so unattractive, so I tend to make sure there are a few inches of fabric below my crotch in leggings and shorts and the like to avoid it.

I like how your friend said to dress for you. To expand on that, dress so you’re comfortable. It’s such bullshit that you have to be in pain to look pretty. Even if you have a fabulous outfit, if it feels too tight or too baggy or too whatever and you aren’t comfortable, it’s just not worth it.

So this! Where I live women’s shoes mostly stop at size 40 (european) so a pretty big minority of women have to nip across the border to Holland to buy. Took me a while to work that out too as I was scratching my head to see where they were getting them. Just because shops sell something doesn’t mean it’s a normal size/shape for us! Just that that’s what they sell most of and they don’t care to cater for much outside the very middle range.

Also, I would check out some good thrift stores and just try on a lot of shit to see what works. And that way if you find out later that you don’t like an item of clothing that looked good on you in the dressing room, you only spent 3 bucks on it, so who cares? I’ve always thought thrift stores make it easier to experiment without much financial risk.

Definitely! I live down the street from a pretty great thrift store in Chicago (run by, and benefiting, a Chicago LGBT health center, bonus) but I don’t hit them up enough. Likewise, there are other good Salvation Army or general thrift stores that I need to visit more, too.

A shopping trip may be in order…

Unfortunately, I need to remember that all too often. I don’t have crazy proportions or anything, but I’m definitely taller than the average woman, and with wider shoulders. It certainly hasn’t been impossible to find good clothing, but I wish more tops were a little longer…there’s a difference between a little belly showing (which I’m not dying to do in the first place) and a shirt creeping up towards my boobs…

I always thought the disagreement about bra straps showing is due to generational differences. My mom is horrified by the idea of having bra straps showing, but for many women my age, your bra straps are a fashion accessory in some outfits. One friend of mine will match her bra to her shorts or skirt and wear a top (that allows the bra straps to show) in a different color. This all seems like too much work to me, and I’ve never thought I look good in spaghetti straps anyway (shoulders too broad and muscular, arms too muscular) so I just stick with the Y-back tank tops, which do look good on me and can be worn with a basic Y-back sports bra.

And I think they refer to the “girl boxers” as “boy shorts,” ironically.

Also, I would check out some good thrift stores and just try on a lot of shit to see what works. And that way if you find out later that you don’t like an item of clothing that looked good on you in the dressing room, you only spent 3 bucks on it, so who cares? I’ve always thought thrift stores make it easier to experiment without much financial risk.

1. I, too, have observed the presence of leggings at American Apparel and Express. Target is also one of my go-to places when I’m looking for basic inexpensive items.
2. I don’t like that layered top look either, and I know plenty of other women who also ignore it (it looks good on some people, and that’s cool, it just doesn’t fit my aesthetic and I don’t see the point of owning a bunch of thin barely visible tops). I wear layers to deal with changing temperatures (e.g. too much AC indoors in this weather), or to dress up an outfit (e.g. jacket or long-sleeved dress shirt over a short sleeved shirt).
3. I’ve observed plenty of women with visible bra straps, enough that my assumption is that it’s considered okay in casual settings. Personally, I prefer to avoid it (I wear a strapless bra with the spaghetti strap dress I have; note that, if you have not already encountered/heard tale of this phenomenon, strapless bras tend to be less supportive and more likely to scooch around annoyingly). From what I’ve noticed, more women tend to go with strapless bras or those weird stick-on things for more formal occasions where they’re wearing a strapless and/or backless dress. Also, I have noticed that many places sell bras with clear plastic-y straps (and/or bras where you can actually change out the straps, thus coordinating with different colors or using clear ones). I don’t know how well these work or how comfortable they are because I have not tried them.
4. I don’t worry if it’s a tiny bit visible, but personally prefer it not to be too visible, e.g. I won’t wear the really lacy bra I have with a thin t-shirt because the lace then creates odd lumps.
5. what maevele said.
7. what mattie said. especially given that some of the recent trends look bad on almost everyone (e.g. the baggy tops that tend to make people look pregnant), I think it’s important to know what flatters one’s individual shape. This is also relevant to body image– many people feel when something doesn’t look good (especially when it’s trendy) that it means their body is wrong. It doesn’t– it means the clothing isn’t flattering on their body. We come in many different shapes, and not everything looks good on everyone (and as I said, some things look terrible on most of us and I have no idea what the designers are thinking).

2)Hmm that’s a good question. I layer a tank top under long sleeved shirts if its too low cut for work. I do that a lot. Or just to add a peak of color to my wardrobe that almost consists of Brown, Black, White, Gray.

Ha, that makes sense…

4) its not a huge deal, but in general you want a smoother bra, you don’t want it to look like the bra is too big which is why its sticking out.

That makes sense, too. I don’t think that’s what’s happening (I hope) but I’ll keep it in mind as a possible source.

You can look at my crotch whenever you want to … hehe.

Oh, I do, baby. I do.