Don’t have the energy to write out anything blindingly coherent, so I though I’d post about some various things that have been on my mind, as well as some blog posts I’ve bookmarked.

First, a brief comment on last night. My fulltime job had a gala opening for our show -slash- fundraiser for the year. It was moderately successful as the first (the show was really fun, the technical problems less so) and somewhat less successful as the second (we’ll find out on monday if we made any money…my hope is we broke even). However, right near the end, someone who hadn’t seen me since pre-transition, but who I’d told earlier in the day that I was going by R now, came up to me and said ‘Hey J!’ and grabbed my boob.

What fun. I said something along the lines of “Totally unacceptable,” and walked away. He tried to come up to me a little later and I said “I don’t want to hear it,” and walked away again. I later hear through a friend that he went up to her and said “I just grabbed R’s boob and I think she’s really pissed at me.” Well, duh!

Meanwhile, I’ve been noticing an increase in traffic to my blog with search results along the lines of ‘i want to be a girl,’ ‘i think i want to be a girl,’ ‘my son says he wants to be a girl,’ and so on. This is really breaking my heart, and I want to write a more thought-out post on the subject at some point, but it’s been on my mind so I figured I’d mention it.

I also wanted to let people know about Dear Diaspora, a blog by a queer Jewish woman that has been a very interesting read. I haven’t really written much about how I feel about my Jewish identity (what that there is) but her postings have already given me a lot to think about. (As a side note, I need to update my blogroll…)

Last but not least, I’m feeling better than my last post, but still not amazing… Arg. I just have no fucking clue what to do to make myself feel better. I feel like there’s a faucet of sadness inside my chest and, although I can empty the sadness every once in a while, it keeps filling back up…

How can I shut off the faucet?

-R

2 Responses to “Things on my mind”

1. Daisy says:

   April 27, 2009 at 9:19 am

   Hey, thanks for the link! I would love to read your thoughts about your Jewish identity, when/if you decide to blog them. (I hope you do!)

   : )

   Reply
2. The Thang Blog » Blog Archive » Do I feel better or worse? says:

   April 30, 2009 at 9:00 pm

   [...] as I mentioned, I was groped at a work event last weekend by someone, D, who was volunteering (and sometimes [...]

   Reply